Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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