I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
