i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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