Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
We left an ass print on the piano.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
