How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize
