youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
