Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Well I just put wine in my tea
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
