:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
you made out with another girl for some wings
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize