She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
