Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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