Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
