I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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