The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
