i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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