i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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