so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
