the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
