my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
