why didn't you poke me back
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
