new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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