don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
