So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
