Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Randomize