Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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