I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
