I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
