im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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