i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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