we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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