But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
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