So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize