last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
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