Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
