The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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