If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
as a side note pls kill me
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
