HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
