You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
everyone is single if you try hard enough
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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