You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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