Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
