About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
