During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
