bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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