a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
