i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Randomize
