tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I touched a dick in church today
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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