Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Sext me about skeletons
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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