why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
