i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
