great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize