I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
