Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
